just another day...

this is gonna be one of those posts where i just have nothing to say again. nothing happened to inspire me nothing happened that was icky just a boring old nothing day. Cant say that it bugs me to have nothing happened but when your trying to do a post a day and have absolutly nothing to say its annoying. lol  i mean realy just give me one thing., but ya no i have nothing. haha anyways maybe tomarrow something will inspire me even if its something to bitch about. lol                                                                                                              
                                                              Hugs and Love,                                                                                  
                                                              Just Some Chick                                                                                

UHHHH feeling so much better now....

So yes been feeling better. I have been completly stressed and i know that ive been pretty  ugly latly. As Nobody really does it to me i have done it too myself. I wish to appoligise for my flippin negativity. We all have so many doubts and things that make us negative but i find when others are negative its rather easy to go that way yourself. So i do appoligise if ive brung anybody down. I realise all i can do is be the best me i can be. I will not be telling people what i think of them being raw like that only hurts people. I wont be doing that. Most of the time when iam pissed i get over it pretty quick so why bring up something that hapened in the past and hurt others. I do beleive in honesty. but honesty comes at a price at times and sometimes its just not worth it.  I love so much i realy do. I know people have issue think iam fake at times and a goodie too shoes. but thats how i feel. I love everybody and i try to make everybody happy. i offer shit even when i know i cant afford it or i know i dont have the time to do it. I piss off some people when i offer to other people. i hate that i do this. but i just cant say no. especially to certain people. I get angry about people being fake and talking shit but i cant cut them out. I should be stronger but its just not me. When i love you i love you. I cannot just cut you out.I do beleive myself to be a good person but if somebody attacks my core , who iam, I do tend to wonder if iam that person. why would they say that if they didnt have a reason too. You know what i mean. So i do beleive in myself but i do have insecuritys as well. This is the core of who iam. If any of you didnt know who iam. Most of you do and most of you have personal experiences with me even to know the core of who iam. I have big dreams and wish so much that i could make them come true. as i get older iam feeling that it is hopeless and wondering if i should try. That sucks. Oddly iam allmost 42 but in my mind iam still 23. that could be good but it could be bad as well. Eh i dont know just sharing what is in my mind at this point. Like it lump it. It is me.              
                                                                 Hugs and Love,                                                                             
                                                                 Just Some Chick                                                                  

Random....

Random random Random... Really have nothing today. Life is uneventful today. I feel a lil icky probly all the stress so i sleept half the day, cooked dinner and now iam sitting on the puter whoopy doo. So i realy have absolutly nothing to say. but iam doing the blog a day thing soo had to put something up here. Hope everybody had a great day.                                                                                                                               
                                                           Hugs and Love,                                                                                
                                                           Just Some Chick                                                                                     

De stressed a bit... thank goodness!

I love it today my biggest worry of this stress filled week is now over. It went extremly well! yahooo! just goes to show what exactly i was worrying about i shouldve just had a lil faith in human beings and i wouldnt have been so damn worried. thats what i need is a lil faith. This is absolutly the most stressed ive been in such a long time. I dont usually let things get to me this much. not last week but the week before last i barely slept. So you know thats bad. I usually have no issues with sleep. but latly with life its been hard to sleep. money issues have been hell and i realise that it happens but its never been this scary. it sucks that all my taxes had to go for bills and i had no fun with them at all. Sucks but at least now we are secure and can get back to normal. iam used to strugling so as long as i can keep it from getting to far behind iam sure ill be fine. Well iam gonna go to sleep now... Maybe?                                                                                                      
                                                        Hugs and love,                                                                                      
                                                         Just Some Chick                                                                                     

Stressed

SOOOO effin stressed out right now. ugh! The last two weeks straight nothing but stress. iam so sick of my life right now. I dont really see the effin point of going on if this is what i have to deal with from week to week. Last week was hell shouldve been good cause we got some money but all of it had to go to rent and effin bills or we would not have a place to live right now. now this week all of my money has to go in a different place. Sucks complete ass if you assk me. Iam so sick of it all. I not saying iam gonna hurt myself cause beleive me ive never had a thought like that. Iam not that effin weak and nothing could make me hurt myself in anyway. Iam just so tired. People think that my husband makes a shit ton of money and i should just have it to give them all. or i should be able to live high on the hog but iam here to tell you thats just not the effin case. I have barely nothing and most of the time thats ok by me but latly its really biting. i hate all the effin stresss. people say there gonna pay me for shit and never show and that effin pisses me off too. money is just so stressful and i dont want to deal with it anymore. I know thats what you have to do to be an adult i get it but so tired of it all. all i really want is a lil relief. thats it no more no less. supposed to go do something with people this weekend guess what i fricken cant. Ugh somedays i just want to run the fuck away!

Kids I tell ya....

SItting here watching american idol with my kids. My kid loves these shows thinks that someday he will be one of those kids trying to  audition for american idol. I think its wonderful and i see myself in him. when i was a kid i wanted to be a dancer then a singer then it all changed and i wanted to be a rockstars wife. Then i decided i wanted to write about all the rockstars in the world. I would still like to do all of that. So maybe if i get my kid singing lessons and invest in him maybe i can live through him. It makes me happy that he is a little like me. I find it amusing as well. He may look like his father but he acts just like me. haha I love to listen to their dreams cause they could still realise all of them. It may be a lil late for me but i hope not. But wouldnt it be amazing if he made all his dreams come true. Have hope in life still even in this crappy festival we call earth today. Hope is seriously laking. I dont want to feel like that but it soo is. So kids changing the world is all we can hope for. I know a few kids that have allready made a huge difference. We all need to beleive in something and why not beleive in your kiddos. Ahhh anyways food for thought, Hope you are all enjoying your day immensly!                                                                                                            
                                                                         Love to all,                                                                        
                                                                         Just Some Chick                                                                       

Another day another headache...

So just here today. nothing really happened to me today. Nothing pissed me off, nothing made me happy. just a day blah blah blah... So we will talk about nothing today. So a friend was talking about how she has gotten lost. What she was before childern and a man in her life how it changed her into being somebody different. I feel this everyday, everything i wanted to be before my kids and husband is not who iam today. Brings the question are we who we should be, or did we totaly miss the bus. Should everybody be able to have it all? Or should we sacrifce who we want to be to have something else. Not saying that being a mom and a wife is a bad thing. Just trying to figure out whether wanting more is just being selfish! Food for thought,                                                                                              
                                                                  Love to all,                                                                                    
                                                                   Just Some Chick